Alright, let’s start with a fact: you can’t control the weather. How many times have you wished for a sunny day and got rain instead? Or planned for snow only to watch the sun melt it away? No matter what, you can’t change it. But here’s the cool part—you don’t need to control everything to be happy. The key is focusing on what you can control, and letting go of the rest.
🎮 Life Is Like a Video Game
(Actually, it is way, way, way better and bigger and more beautiful and amazing than a video game…but for the sake of this article, let’s just go with it….)
Think of life like a video game. You control your character—how you move, the tools you use, and your strategy. But you can’t control how the game is designed or what other players do. What you can control is how you play—your choices, reactions, and game plan. The more you focus on that, the better you get.
In life, it’s the same. You can’t control everything—like what people do or the weather—but you can control how you respond. That’s how you get stronger and smarter at handling challenges.
🌹 Life Is Also Like a Garden
Here’s another metaphor—your life is like a garden. You can’t control how much it rains, how hot it gets, or even if some bugs show up to mess with your plants. But you can still make your garden thrive. You can control how much water you give your plants, whether you pull out the weeds, and if you give them the nutrients they need. The more you focus on what you can do, the better your garden looks.
And life works the same way. Take care of the things you can control—your habits, your actions, your attitude—and you’ll see yourself growing, no matter what’s happening around you.
You can Think of Life Like a School Play, Too
Ok, here’s one last metaphor for you. Ever been in a school play? Picture this: you’ve got your lines memorized, your costume is on point, and you’re ready to rock the stage. But you can’t control how the audience reacts, and you can’t control if one of the other actors forgets his or her lines. What you can control is your own performance. You can focus on delivering your best lines, hitting your marks, and giving it your all. That’s how you crush it, no matter what else is going on.
Own Your Part: Focus On What You Can Control
Life will always throw stuff at you that’s out of your hands—like what other people think or whether it rains on your big day. But here’s the key: when you focus on what you can control, like your actions, your attitude, and your effort, you take responsibility for what really matters. The more you own your part, the less you stress about the things you can’t change. By taking self-responsibility, you start feeling more confident and ready to handle anything life throws your way.
So, get out there and focus on playing your best game, taking care of your own garden, and delivering your best performance.
The rest? Let it go.
Things You Can Control
(
Focus on this stuff!!)- Your Actions: You decide what you do and how you do it.
- Your Responses: You get to choose how you react when things do or don’t go your way.
- Your Attitude: You control whether you stay positive or let things bring you down.
- Your Thoughts: You can shape your thoughts to focus on what’s possible and what’s good.
- Your Effort: You control how hard you work, whether it’s for school, sports, or anything else.
Things You Can’t Control:
(🎈 Don’t waste your energy on these….)
- Other People’s Actions: You can’t control what your friends, family, or classmates do.
- What Others Think: Their thoughts? Not your business.
- Other People’s Feelings: You can’t decide how others feel, whether they’re happy, upset, or anything in between. Their emotions are theirs to handle, not yours.
- The Weather: Whether it’s sunny or raining, that’s out of your hands.
- The Past: What’s done is done. You can only move forward.
1. How you respond to challenges
2. Following through with your responsibilities
3. How you say what you need
4. When and how often you smile
5. Owning up to your mistakes
6. How much effort you put forth in anything
7. How you take care of yourself
8. When you ask for help
9. When and if you forgive others
10. The goals you create for yourself
11. What you focus on in this very moment
12. Doing activities that mean something to you
13. The kind of attitude you have
14. Getting enough rest and/or sleep
15. Who you ask for help
16. Respecting (or not) other people’s boundaries
17. When you show empathy
18. How you act in any situation
19. If you focus on the negatives or positives
20. How you talk to and treat yourself
21. How much exercise you do
22. The words you use & how you communicate
23. How you deal with your feelings
24. Whether or not you help someone
25. Choosing to accept and/or let go
26. How truthful and honest you are
27. How you interpret and perceive things
28. If and when you get back up & try again
29. How organized you are
30. How you treat other people
31. How polite (or not) you are
32. How you show others you care about them
33. Whether or not you keep your word
34. What coping tools you use
35. How you hold your body (like your posture)
36. When you practice gratitude
37. How you deal with mistakes and failure
38. Learning more about what makes you curious
39. Going outside & enjoying nature
40. Expressing what you hope for
41. When you ignore behavior that annoys you
42. When you talk about your thoughts & feelings
43. Defining and choosing your values
44. With whom you make & keep friendships
45. When you take slow, mindful breaths
46. Working (or not) on your goals
47. How much responsibility you take for your life
48. Deciding what your boundaries are
49. When you listen to others (or not)
50. Whether or not you stop & smell the roses
Ready to have some fun?
Spin the wheel and answer over 25 questions that help you take control of your life! Grab this digital spinner when you sign up for WholeHearted’s Newsletter!